Perry to Drop Out, Endorse Gingrich

"Welcome back, Newt... I kept the couch warm for you..."

"Early Christmas Gift" for Newt, Coal for Herman Cain's Stocking...

House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi is threatening to "dish dirt" from then-Speaker and now wannabe teletubby in chief New Gingrich's ethics committee hearings that wound up with Gingrich paying over $300,000 in ethics fines.

A defiant Gingrich defied Pelosi to bring it, calling it an "early Christmas gift."

I dunno.  Maybe Newt should take his own advice to Herman Cain and come clean about his past indiscretions.  I mean, there were a lot of charges, you know, which indicates a pattern, and where there's a lotta smoke there's gotta be some fire, and he shoulda got ahead of this and not been blindsided it and if only he'd been more up front about this stuff with his staff and supporters...

"Hey wait a minute!  I know this tune!"

Yeah, Herman, you do, but you know what?  Bet they don't play it for Newt.

SHOCKING SPOILER PHOTO FROM THE AVENGERS MOVIE!

The True Face of Evil Exposed!

Breaking News: Nancy Pelosi Hospitalized in Rome!

A Three Beers Later Exclusive by Guest Columnist P.K. 'Pug' Parker-Noonan, Mainstream Conservative Doyenne...


"House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi was briefly hospitalized today in Rome after she inexplicably came in contact with holy water in the foyer of St. Peter's Cathedral.


"Authorities were unsure how the Minority Leader came into contact with the holy water — 'It's something she normally avoids religiously, er...' said a spokesman for Representative Pelosi — but eyewitnesses report some sort of confrontation  with an elderly Scandinavian gentleman shouting, "The Power of Christ Compels You!"


"This is not the first time the former Speaker of the House has run into this situation in Italy.  During a previous audience with the Pope as Speaker, several Dominican priests forcibly exorcised the then-Speaker from the Vatican grounds.


"Italian hospital officials described Ms. Pelosi's injuries as 'minor' and said the burns were alleviated by the topical application of thick wads of campaign cash.


"I'm sure we all wish the Minority Leader a swift recovery and look forward to the tone of elegance and sophistication she brings to the Washington political and social scene."

You can't buy this kind of class....