A Three Beers Later Exclusive Guest Post: Sean Hannity's Freedom Concert — San Diego! Mainstream Conservative Pundits Venture into the Heart of Rightwing Darkness!

Mainstream Conservative Pundits Frumley Brooks, David Fume and Mainsteam Conservative Doyenne P.K. "Pug" Noonan bravely and nobly abandoned the civilized comforts of the Boswash Corridor for this harrowing excursion into the depths of reactionary American thought.


TBL has refrained from crediting direct quotes to any of them in this publication, because really, who can tell them apart anymore anyway?


The disappointing crowd barely overflowed the San Diego Sports Arena.  Authoritative sources at the Associated Press and New York Times put the attendance at somwhere between 1800 and 2000, describing photos of the attendees as 'misleading' and 'deceptive.'

As at previous events, a rustic gentleman familiarly addressed as 'Charlie' made several attempts upon a 'fiddle' and other stringed instruments while championing social concepts tragically inappropriate to 21st century conservatism such as property rights and punishment for criminals.  He even showed a regrettable lack of acceptance for the sexually-differentiated with a blistering attack on pedophiles, a position sadly out of step with the more nuanced posture at present adopted by this Administration's Department of Education.

Nevertheless he did so with such brio that at some point in the proceedings (I believe it was during "The Legend of Wooley Swamp") our colleague Pug was obliged to retire to the ladies' lounge and compose herself — twice.

In a further surprise after last year's concert, the hat really does come off.

In  spite of his young son's gallant attempt to put an end to these reactionary proceedings by breaking several of his father's ribs beforehand in a carefully-staged "play accident," Fox News "personality" Sean Hannity took the stage at several points in the proceedings, promising his gullible audience a landslide victory in the November midterms (a position held by no one who is anyone in DC or NYC, might I add), and  that the Ground Zero Peace, Friendship and Understanding Mosque would never be built.  He also made mention of the inconsequential fact that his foundation that sponsors these "concerts" had raised over fifteen million dollars to send the children of fallen servicemen and women to college.

The show then continued with "Christian artist" Michael W. Smith offering several musical pieces ostensibly extolling faith and patriotism, oddly without once mentioning the Episcopalian church's heroic embrace of brave, family-abandoning gay bishops or the Reverend Phelps' principled stand for faith and the First Amendment at military funerals, so we really must question his sincerity...

After that there were several speakers, including Hollywood personality Jon Voight, that same Colonel Oliver North who so embarrassed Congress, and numerous Gold Star families and recipients of some of Sean Hannity's scholarship largess.  Oddly, none of them seemed to be pursuing ethnic studies, political science or the arts degrees so essential to success in civilized company.

At this point, the wheels came off the event entirely.  A mister Leonard Skinner, if we heard the name correctly brought his "band" on for a "set"... in the course of which he launched a reprehensible attack on the fine singer Neil Young and agitated dangerously for religious practice and firearms ownership, while presenting an alarming audio-visual work of imagery calculated to lure the weak-willed into debauchery and perhaps even drug abuse.  The crowd was obviously worked up to the very edge of an outburst.

Then, to goad the mob on into a veritable frenzy, "Charlie" returned to the stage to "jam" with Leonard.  The atmosphere within the arena was so fraught with the prospect of unbridled license that our colleague Frumley was obliged to retire to the gentleman's lounge and very nearly compose himself. We will spare the reader the intensity of any further description on our part and simply present some smuggled video of the onstage bacchanalia:




Honestly, how these people expect themselves to be capable of governance escapes us entirely...

Nazis, Mobsters Conspire to Foment Disorder...

A dispatch from Frumley Brooks, Esq., Mainstream Conservative Pundit:

"To my surprise, it turned out it simply to be some sort of musical event... a Freedom Concert Tour... Nevertheless, there was ample evidence on display of the waning of primitive conservative thought in this great moderate nation of ours...

"The dwindling acceptance of conservative values by the American public was reflected in this meagre line of attendees for "radio personality" Marc Levin (who insists on mispronouncing his own last name,a singular affectation of the lower sorts) signing his Liberty and Tyranny, now sliding into its deserved obscurity after a scant five months on the New York Times Bestseller List... the line barely stretched around the facility...

"...while the 12,000 seat Cricket Wireless Amphitheatre, formerly the Coors Amphitheatre before sophisticated Americans learned to seek more nuanced beverages, was only barely sold out, with every seat only just filled before showtime...

"As the evening wore on into a twilight evocative of the fading of the brand of reactionary thought being scorned by all the right people on both coasts, the gullible audience was subjected to harangues by the aforementioned Mr. Levin, Colonel Oliver North, whose lack of martial credentials is clearly reflected in the CNN's failure to hire him as a commentator, another "personality" named Sean Hannity, who apparently has something to do with the presentation of these events, a "celebrity" trollop named Carrie Prejean, who seems most famous for not knowing when it is unacceptable to talk back to her betters, and various wounded veterans for whom the audience expressed an inexplicable sympathy in spite of their drain on the public exchequer as a result of their own un fortunate career choices...

"There were also various musical interludes. A rural gentleman familiarly addressed as "Charley" made several attempts upon a "fiddle" and guitar...

"...while other performers said to include a Michael W. Smith, Billy Ray Cyrus, and Lee Greenwood were charitably received by the unlettered audience...

"The continuing existence of these events is only to be regretted by the informed conservative, as they only serve to continue to refute their attendees' deserved sense of isolation and reinforce the dated values to which they cling. The only thing to be said in its favor was the continued absence of Sarah Palin...

"Perhaps Mr. Obama might well take some time off from his inspiring medical ruminations to consider taking some action towards them."

Frumley Brooks, Esq., as he appeared moments before

the head injury that led him to embrace

moderate conservatism...