Acting in accordance with yet another Brooks family motto, "manibus vacuis, et ad imbecillum spinam," ("empty hands and a weak spine")* mainstream conservative pundit Frumley Brooks sets forth into the dark conservative heart of redstate California.
*Honestly, old boy, your family line seems to have more cadets than the Citadel. — TBL
This past Saturday, February 23rd, (or '.223' as they are inexplicably euphemizing it) was declared by the "commontariat" to be a National Day of Resistance to our Esteemed President Obama and his far-sighted and reasonable proposals that the American people should put their trust in the wise management of the public safety and order in the hands of a man who has so clearly shown his mettle in the management of the public fisc.
Donning attire appropriate to his assessment of the event, your correspondent ventured forth into the rustic confines of Bakersfield, California, where a firm named Bear Mountain Sporting Goods, devoted to the retailing of numerous implements available in any color as long as you wanted them in scary black, had organized the First Kern County Day of Resistance, although to your correspondent's perception it seemed the only thing Bakersfield was resisting was the shoveling-up of excess fertilizer. (Seriously, people, we do appreciate the vegetables, but the ungodly pong...)
An earnest young lady manning the gate with clipboard and tally sheet informed your correspondent that some 1400 people had already arrived. Unconfirmed reports later in the day would put the crowd as high as 2000, as parking overflowed the local streets, supervised by local Sheriff's Deputies and the California Highway Patrol (one loves the boots, you know, simply dashing).
Two gentlemen in black suits with name tags and earpieces circulated, largely ignored but objecting to being photographed, through the largely Caucasian and Hispanic crowd, which remained cheerful and in good order as they were harangued by Republican politicians from Sacramento (apparently there still are some), conservative activists and a gentleman from Cuba who claimed to see the same political tactics and practices his family fled there taking place here. (My good fellow: simply because one sees the same practices being employed, to the same ends, with the same result, is no good reason to assume any commonality of intent, as any graduate of a decent Ivy League humanities program can explain to you at length).
An earnest gentleman of substantial girth and excessive hair explained to a local newswoman that the Second Amendment was a civil right every bit as valid and important as those granted by the First, Fourth, and Fifth. Inexplicably he neglected the Third, which provides a valuable opportunity for our Esteemed President Obama to further advance his dynamic social experiments. Elsewhere, other individuals offered suggestion for the managing the intractable problem of gun violence.
In addition there were musical stylings by what your correspondent was assured is a very good country band, that brought back noisome remembrances of similar encounters with a Mr. Charles Daniel and one Leonard Skinner, who could not even spell the name of his band properly, at Mr. Sean Hannity's "Freedom Concerts".