BREAKING NEWS — EX-HILLARY AIDE SHAVES BEARD, DUCKS HUSBAND'S RESIGNATION SPEECH

Hillary's ex-personal assistant, Huma Abedin, wife of disgraced Congressman Anthony Weiner, was not present today as Weiner resigned from Congress in the wake of his sexting scandal.

Before a jeering crowd, Weiner thanked his parents for giving him his sense of values, causing his outraged mother to shout, "You take that back!"...

Oral Evolutions...

Democrat Eric Massa is resigning from Congress in the face of allegations he sexually harassed a male staff member.  However, he seems to think it's because he has a real potty mouth, not what he wanted to put in it...


“I own this reality. There is no doubt in my mind that I did in fact, use language in the privacy of my own home and in my inner office that, after 24 years in the Navy, might make a Chief Petty Officer feel uncomfortable...”


Now in Massa's defense, I have to say that the standards of acceptable language in the US military have changed over the years.  So it's entirely possible a senior noncommissioned office might have construed his language as objectionable.


For example, a typical exchange over the hood of a HUMVEE* today might go something like this:


"Look at this, Specialist, you have over-tightened the lug nut on this tire and stripped the threads.  This is not work  to standard and is unacceptable."


"Top, I made a mistake and I will fix it immediately."


Now back in my day, over the hood of a jeep, the conversation would have gone something like this:


"Fuck! Fucking Fucker's Fucking Fucked!  Fucker!"


"Fuck me..."


If memory serves, this brings to something like 50 the number of  Democrats nationwide cutting and running on their own country, through retirement or resignation...


*Given the topic, I thought I'd avoid "Hummer..."

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